Along with beginning my first book this November, I’ve decided to participate in BlogHer’s NaBloPoMo, which stands for National Blog Posting Month. Yes, I’m crazy. Yes, I may be a fool. And, yes…I will probably be mumbling utter nonsense by November 30, but I have a confession to make. I’ve missed blogging. Stepping away from it ever so slightly these past few months has given me a new perspective on writing, its effect on others, and what it means to me. I’m always learning.
The theme for NaBloPoMo this year is Type Your Heart Out. I’m going to use this time to focus on a few questions. Why have I chosen to type my heart out? Why is writing like bleeding? How do I feel when no one reads what I’ve written? What do I do when someone is offended by what I have written? What do others get from my writing? What does it give me? Am I too old to write a book, especially a young adult novel? How do I stumble through my insecurities? What is my ultimate purpose here as I edge closer and closer to my seventh decade navigating this earthly expedition?
The one thing I do know is since I have begun this writing journey, it has become a part of me. I am a writer, no matter how paltry my audience or how sucky my style. Because writing helps me breathe. It is my therapy. It gives me strength. It is my courage.
Here are a few things I have discovered about myself through writing. I have heart. I love with abandon. I have hurt others. I have been clumsy and awful. I have my own shame. I have a darkness, yet my light continues to poke through every day. My story isn’t over yet. I’m still knee deep into the middle of my second act. As Brene Brown says, “The middle is messy, but it’s also where the magic happens.”
I am ready for the magic.