Ten years ago last December my husband and I were married by Admiral Busby down in Key West, Florida. Wanting a nontraditional wedding, everything was ordered online from the dress to the ceremony. The website had a choice of vows, and sticking with the unusual we picked the American Indian ones that focused more on honoring than obeying. I called them “our groovy vows,” but to be honest, I can’t remember most of the words. I tried to look them up on the Admiral’s website, but he appears to have retired. It doesn’t matter. On that beautiful winter evening on Smather’s Beach we vowed to love each other through life’s trials. We spoke from the heart and promised to stand together.
Even though we didn’t recite the traditional, “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health,” we have lived those words this past decade.
We have supported decisions, rode financial down times, encouraged new paths, and applauded successes. We have seen each other at our worst and weakest. We have wiped tears and held hands.
Both of us emerged from previous marriages with scars, but acknowledge those wounds have made us stronger, wiser, tougher. Our connection is forged through our pasts, and it continues to grow with every twist in the road.
A successful marriage is not for the faint of heart. It is messy and never travels a straight line. In order for it to succeed, we must consult a new map every day.
We are better because we navigate life’s bumps together.
We are richer because we are a strong team.
We are healthy because we laugh every day.
We are drunk on love because we see each other clearly, with open hearts and raucous giggles.
We are each other’s home.
“Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.”
– Oscar Wilde